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Something to Tell Myself

from Hyacinth EP by Romanus

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lyrics

I'm gonna get my driver's licence next year,
I'm not ready but I need the ID.
my mom says I can always talk to her,
but I'm afraid that then she won't like me.

when all the bad habits that I can't shake
write themselves out in jagged red lines,
I pretend that love is real to convince myself
that I don't wanna die.

I'm sorry if you didn't know.
but even if fear is no way to grow...

(it's no way to grow but)
I'm still alive,
I'm still alive.
the heartbeat in my chest,
I claim it, it's mine.
I'm still alive,
I'm still alive,
I'm still alive.

so when I get my driver's license, then what?
will it suddenly make me less afraid?
if I panic and kill someone, then what?
(then what)
I said I wasn't ready but the world never waits.

this is when I say that I don't wanna die.

(it'd be a lie but)
I'm still alive,
I'm still alive.
the heartbeat in my chest,
I claim it, it's mine.
I'm still alive,
I'm still alive,
I'm still alive.

agnus dei, dona nobis pacem.
agnus dei, grant us peace.
I'm alive, I'm still alive
I'm alive, I'm still alive!
I'm alive, I'm still alive
I'm alive, I'm still alive!

I'm still alive,
I'll stay alive,
I'm still alive.

I'll stay alive.

credits

from Hyacinth EP, released February 14, 2020

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Romanus Boston, Massachusetts

I make a somewhat messy chimera of bedroom pop/chamber pop/alternative/folktronica. Hope it makes you feel something. I also make music with my sibling under the name Charlemagne's Angels, check us out!

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